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(For those who might worry, I'm all right at the moment. These are merely the thoughts I had as I was drawing this.)
Again and again I find myself at these crossroads. Deep down I want to be angry at the world, angry at the things going on around me. I see it almost regularly: good people being threatened, forced into bad situations, taken advantage of, and even injured or killed. The reasons are even more messed up: Because they look different, act different, have different beliefs and values, and for the mere act of existence outside of a set of 'norms' that can and will challenge someone's worldview. I want to understand why people act like this, why they would turn on their fellow human beings for the most trivial of reasons. As far as I was raised, many issues were never fully about picking A or B. We are far more complicated than we think, and so are most situations. But to many of us, it's much easier to point fingers, shift blame, and put down a person or set of people purely for being different. Nowadays, some people believe that the mere mention or show of empathy is a sign of weakness. But from my own experiences... it is a fail-safe.
Because I know the moment I throw away my empathy, I will have thrown away my humanity. If I start caring less for those around me, and seek only personal gain in return, I will become as hollow as a dead tree. And to be honest, I truly fear that day if it happens. My personality, my beliefs, and yes, my empathy and my humanity, all make me who I am today. I know there will be those out there that will tell me that I'm setting myself up to be walked all over. Being kind or empathetic doesn't mean I can't or won't set boundaries. In truth, I never want to. But the moment someone starts causing trouble for me and those around me, even I have my limits. To me, anyone who would take advantage of others for the sake of personal gain and with no regard to those around them simply show their true colors, outing themselves as a result. A simple mistake is one thing, but to do it continuously over and over again over a short period, emboldened because I think you deserve a second chance, only makes me believe you learned nothing and aren't interested in learning at all.
And every time I see it, Every time I experience it, I find myself at these crossroads again. Sometimes, I know which way to go, with no regrets or reservations. But there are moments where I arrive at these roads when I'm on the verge of giving up, when just I feel completely disconnected from everything, and when I just feel invisible to most people. Half of me sometimes wants to get revenge, to prove to all of those who told me I wouldn't make it in the world at different points in my life that I can and will find my own path. I know now that even if I do the things they told my I couldn't, they'll just move the goalpost again, completely waving me off. People hate for the sake of hating. For the sake of self-preservation either for their lifestyles or their pride and ego. And again, because it's easier to blame someone then to look into a mirror.
And so, I have to remind myself regularly to stay the course. I deserve to live my life as peacefully and happily as I can get it to be. There will always be hardships, of course, but it's no excuse to give in to hate. It's no excuse to ruin another person's life for your own happiness. My story will always be different from yours, as will the paths we take.
At the end of the day we all take our own paths through life, our meetings and farewells mere crossroads in the path we follow. Friends and family that support you will gladly walk this path alongside you, but sooner or later as life changes, some of them will break off of it. Whether it's because they can no longer follow it, or something forces them off of it. We are only seeing the cover and a few pages of a person's story, and if any of us were ever to take a deep dive into it like a real book, we may begin to understand what and why they were brought to this moment in their journey. Many people fear that, and just as many people want to understand and connect.
We all follow our own paths, and although we cross each other regularly, only you can dictate how the journey ends. That is why I try to remain on the right path, hard as it might be at times.
Again and again I find myself at these crossroads. Deep down I want to be angry at the world, angry at the things going on around me. I see it almost regularly: good people being threatened, forced into bad situations, taken advantage of, and even injured or killed. The reasons are even more messed up: Because they look different, act different, have different beliefs and values, and for the mere act of existence outside of a set of 'norms' that can and will challenge someone's worldview. I want to understand why people act like this, why they would turn on their fellow human beings for the most trivial of reasons. As far as I was raised, many issues were never fully about picking A or B. We are far more complicated than we think, and so are most situations. But to many of us, it's much easier to point fingers, shift blame, and put down a person or set of people purely for being different. Nowadays, some people believe that the mere mention or show of empathy is a sign of weakness. But from my own experiences... it is a fail-safe.
Because I know the moment I throw away my empathy, I will have thrown away my humanity. If I start caring less for those around me, and seek only personal gain in return, I will become as hollow as a dead tree. And to be honest, I truly fear that day if it happens. My personality, my beliefs, and yes, my empathy and my humanity, all make me who I am today. I know there will be those out there that will tell me that I'm setting myself up to be walked all over. Being kind or empathetic doesn't mean I can't or won't set boundaries. In truth, I never want to. But the moment someone starts causing trouble for me and those around me, even I have my limits. To me, anyone who would take advantage of others for the sake of personal gain and with no regard to those around them simply show their true colors, outing themselves as a result. A simple mistake is one thing, but to do it continuously over and over again over a short period, emboldened because I think you deserve a second chance, only makes me believe you learned nothing and aren't interested in learning at all.
And every time I see it, Every time I experience it, I find myself at these crossroads again. Sometimes, I know which way to go, with no regrets or reservations. But there are moments where I arrive at these roads when I'm on the verge of giving up, when just I feel completely disconnected from everything, and when I just feel invisible to most people. Half of me sometimes wants to get revenge, to prove to all of those who told me I wouldn't make it in the world at different points in my life that I can and will find my own path. I know now that even if I do the things they told my I couldn't, they'll just move the goalpost again, completely waving me off. People hate for the sake of hating. For the sake of self-preservation either for their lifestyles or their pride and ego. And again, because it's easier to blame someone then to look into a mirror.
And so, I have to remind myself regularly to stay the course. I deserve to live my life as peacefully and happily as I can get it to be. There will always be hardships, of course, but it's no excuse to give in to hate. It's no excuse to ruin another person's life for your own happiness. My story will always be different from yours, as will the paths we take.
At the end of the day we all take our own paths through life, our meetings and farewells mere crossroads in the path we follow. Friends and family that support you will gladly walk this path alongside you, but sooner or later as life changes, some of them will break off of it. Whether it's because they can no longer follow it, or something forces them off of it. We are only seeing the cover and a few pages of a person's story, and if any of us were ever to take a deep dive into it like a real book, we may begin to understand what and why they were brought to this moment in their journey. Many people fear that, and just as many people want to understand and connect.
We all follow our own paths, and although we cross each other regularly, only you can dictate how the journey ends. That is why I try to remain on the right path, hard as it might be at times.
(For those who might worry, I'm all right at the moment. These are merely the thoughts I had as I was drawing this.)
Again and again I find myself at these crossroads. Deep down I want to be angry at the world, angry at the things going on around me. I see it almost regularly: good people being threatened, forced into bad situations, taken advantage of, and even injured or killed. The reasons are even more messed up: Because they look different, act different, have different beliefs and values, and for the mere act of existence outside of a set of 'norms' that can and will challenge someone's worldview. I want to understand why people act like this, why they would turn on their fellow human beings for the most trivial of reasons. As far as I was raised, many issues were never fully about picking A or B. We are far more complicated than we think, and so are most situations. But to many of us, it's much easier to point fingers, shift blame, and put down a person or set of people purely for being different. Nowadays, some people believe that the mere mention or show of empathy is a sign of weakness. But from my own experiences... it is a fail-safe.
Because I know the moment I throw away my empathy, I will have thrown away my humanity. If I start caring less for those around me, and seek only personal gain in return, I will become as hollow as a dead tree. And to be honest, I truly fear that day if it happens. My personality, my beliefs, and yes, my empathy and my humanity, all make me who I am today. I know there will be those out there that will tell me that I'm setting myself up to be walked all over. Being kind or empathetic doesn't mean I can't or won't set boundaries. In truth, I never want to. But the moment someone starts causing trouble for me and those around me, even I have my limits. To me, anyone who would take advantage of others for the sake of personal gain and with no regard to those around them simply show their true colors, outing themselves as a result. A simple mistake is one thing, but to do it continuously over and over again over a short period, emboldened because I think you deserve a second chance, only makes me believe you learned nothing and aren't interested in learning at all.
And every time I see it, Every time I experience it, I find myself at these crossroads again. Sometimes, I know which way to go, with no regrets or reservations. But there are moments where I arrive at these roads when I'm on the verge of giving up, when just I feel completely disconnected from everything, and when I just feel invisible to most people. Half of me sometimes wants to get revenge, to prove to all of those who told me I wouldn't make it in the world at different points in my life that I can and will find my own path. I know now that even if I do the things they told my I couldn't, they'll just move the goalpost again, completely waving me off. People hate for the sake of hating. For the sake of self-preservation either for their lifestyles or their pride and ego. And again, because it's easier to blame someone then to look into a mirror.
And so, I have to remind myself regularly to stay the course. I deserve to live my life as peacefully and happily as I can get it to be. There will always be hardships, of course, but it's no excuse to give in to hate. It's no excuse to ruin another person's life for your own happiness. My story will always be different from yours, as will the paths we take.
At the end of the day we all take our own paths through life, our meetings and farewells mere crossroads in the path we follow. Friends and family that support you will gladly walk this path alongside you, but sooner or later as life changes, some of them will break off of it. Whether it's because they can no longer follow it, or something forces them off of it. We are only seeing the cover and a few pages of a person's story, and if any of us were ever to take a deep dive into it like a real book, we may begin to understand what and why they were brought to this moment in their journey. Many people fear that, and just as many people want to understand and connect.
We all follow our own paths, and although we cross each other regularly, only you can dictate how the journey ends. That is why I try to remain on the right path, hard as it might be at times.
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