I've had this idea in my head for literally years now with several variations of it, but I've never been able to put it out on a canvas because it's been so hard to even begin with grasping the emotion in it or how to convey it. I'm not even sure myself what it is I'm trying to get out but it's something visceral, maybe hopeless, or hopefull I'm not good with words when it comes to feelings, I can't force something into a such a modern age medium, words already are defined with their own rules and categories, feelings just, are I recently discovered "[ITIIITIATIIHYLIHYL](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXqNwcrVq_Q)" by BLACKSHAPE, and it immediately struck me, it's very powerful, beautiful and so heartfelt, it finally motivated me enough to make the beginning stages of something This is no way a finished piece, and I think this is something I'll work on every now and then for some years to come, I hope some day I've reached some kind of understanding of this and be able to finally let it go